Friday, April 27, 2007
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Monday, April 23, 2007
Yeltsin's Sense of Humour
Boris Yeltsin responds to a reporter's characterisation of him as a 'disaster' at the end of a successful summit with the then President of the United States; and Bill Clinton is beside himself with laughter.
So was he a disaster or not? He was a catalyst for democracy in the Soviet Union but also someone who partly through alcoholism & ill health proved unable to institutionalise reform sufficiently. Putin took over and has since been dragging the nation back towards dictatorship.
Boris Yeltsin died today.
Only history can tell whether his reforms will stand the test of time. I am not hopeful.
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Monday, March 26, 2007
You ARE Being Watched
1 in every 5 of the 25 million cctv cameras in the world (that's 20%) is located in the United Kingdom. That's 5,000,000 cameras watching the citizens of this country. Or an average of 300 cameras a day trained on you in London on a typical outing.
Have a happy day out.
Friday, March 23, 2007
What You Would Hear If You Were Just About To Go Into Battle
Kuwaiti DesertAbout 20 miles from Iraq
Wednesday 19 March 2003
800 men of the 1st Battalion of the Royal Irish Regiment, part of 16 Air Assault Brigade along with a company of Gurkhas and soldiers from Fiji, Antigua, St Vincent, South Africa, Australia and Canada have gathered on the eve of battle at their Fort Blair Mayne camp in the Kuwaiti desert about 20 miles from the Iraqi border.
An embedded reporter takes up the story. "It was just after a sandstorm and all the men were standing around their commanding officer, Col Tim Collins, in a U-shape in the middle of a very dusty courtyard. The CO had said to me, 'I'll have to say a few words to the men to explain to them why they should take their anthrax drugs and malaria pills, or they just won't bother'. A lot of the Irish Rangers are very young and he wanted to explain something of the history and culture of Iraq to them. They knew that the public at home had doubts about the rightness of the war and he wanted to reassure them and tell them why they were there. It just grew and grew into something magnificent - it made you realise the true meaning of the term 'rallying cry'. He delivered the speech completely off the cuff," she recalls.
Although no recording of the speech was ever made, the reporter knew shorthand and managed to capture every word.
This is what he said.
"We go to liberate, not to conquer. We will not fly our flags in their country. We are entering Iraq to free a people and the only flag which will be flown in that ancient land is their own. Show respect for them.
There are some who are alive at this moment who will not be alive shortly. Those who do not wish to go on that journey, we will not send. As for the others, I expect you to rock their world. Wipe them out if that is what they choose. But if you are ferocious in battle remember to be magnanimous in victory.
Iraq is steeped in history. It is the site of the Garden of Eden, of the Great Flood and the birthplace of Abraham. Tread lightly there. You will see things that no man could pay to see and you will have to go a long way to find a more decent, generous and upright people than the Iraqis. You will be embarrassed by their hospitality even though they have nothing. Don't treat them as refugees for they are in their own country. Their children will be poor, in years to come they will know that the light of liberation in their lives was brought by you.
If there are casualties of war then remember that when they woke up and got dressed in the morning they did not plan to die this day. Allow them dignity in death. Bury them properly and mark their graves. It is my foremost intention to bring every single one of you out alive. But there may be people among us who will not see the end of this campaign. We will put them in their sleeping bags and send them back. There will be no time for sorrow.
The enemy should be in no doubt that we are his nemesis and that we are bringing about his rightful destruction. There are many regional commanders who have stains on their souls and they are stoking the fires of hell for Saddam. He and his forces will be destroyed by this coalition for what they have done. As they die they will know their deeds have brought them to this place. Show them no pity.
It is a big step to take another human life. It is not to be done lightly. I know of men who have taken life needlessly in other conflicts. I can assure you they live with the mark of Cain upon them. If someone surrenders to you then remember they have that right in international law and ensure that one day they go home to their family. The ones who wish to fight, well, we aim to please.
If you harm the regiment or its history by over-enthusiasm in killing or in cowardice, know it is your family who will suffer. You will be shunned unless your conduct is of the highest. For your deeds will follow you down through history. We will bring shame on neither our uniform or our nation.
[As for Saddam's chemical and biological weapons] It is not a question of if, it's a question of when. We know he has already devolved the decision to lower commanders, and that means he has already taken the decision himself. If we survive the first strike we will survive the attack.
As for ourselves, let's bring everyone home and leave Iraq a better place for us having been there.
Our business now is north."
There are some who are alive at this moment who will not be alive shortly. Those who do not wish to go on that journey, we will not send. As for the others, I expect you to rock their world. Wipe them out if that is what they choose. But if you are ferocious in battle remember to be magnanimous in victory.
Iraq is steeped in history. It is the site of the Garden of Eden, of the Great Flood and the birthplace of Abraham. Tread lightly there. You will see things that no man could pay to see and you will have to go a long way to find a more decent, generous and upright people than the Iraqis. You will be embarrassed by their hospitality even though they have nothing. Don't treat them as refugees for they are in their own country. Their children will be poor, in years to come they will know that the light of liberation in their lives was brought by you.
If there are casualties of war then remember that when they woke up and got dressed in the morning they did not plan to die this day. Allow them dignity in death. Bury them properly and mark their graves. It is my foremost intention to bring every single one of you out alive. But there may be people among us who will not see the end of this campaign. We will put them in their sleeping bags and send them back. There will be no time for sorrow.
The enemy should be in no doubt that we are his nemesis and that we are bringing about his rightful destruction. There are many regional commanders who have stains on their souls and they are stoking the fires of hell for Saddam. He and his forces will be destroyed by this coalition for what they have done. As they die they will know their deeds have brought them to this place. Show them no pity.
It is a big step to take another human life. It is not to be done lightly. I know of men who have taken life needlessly in other conflicts. I can assure you they live with the mark of Cain upon them. If someone surrenders to you then remember they have that right in international law and ensure that one day they go home to their family. The ones who wish to fight, well, we aim to please.
If you harm the regiment or its history by over-enthusiasm in killing or in cowardice, know it is your family who will suffer. You will be shunned unless your conduct is of the highest. For your deeds will follow you down through history. We will bring shame on neither our uniform or our nation.
[As for Saddam's chemical and biological weapons] It is not a question of if, it's a question of when. We know he has already devolved the decision to lower commanders, and that means he has already taken the decision himself. If we survive the first strike we will survive the attack.
As for ourselves, let's bring everyone home and leave Iraq a better place for us having been there.
Our business now is north."
Thursday, March 22, 2007
One Of The Most Incredible Speeches Of The Twentieth Century
Want to hear what a prophetic, nation-changing, culture-shaping voice sounds like? Here it is.
So We Designed The Pilot Out and We Just Use Computers Now...
Ooops... I'm sure it's just a minor bug. Back to the drawing board, Doofus.
Pachelbel As He Would Have Written It Today...
"Well, we would like Pachelbel's Canon but could you just sort of funk it up a little bit for us? I mean we don't want it too stately like..."
"You mean like this?"
"I just think you're showing off now."
"You mean like this?"
"I just think you're showing off now."
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
You see... That's Just What Happens When You Haven't Been Practising Enough.
Shocking. If she spent half as much time practising as she did watching the Simpsons on TV and playing Nintendo she might eventually be able to play this piece a bit quicker and with a little more feeling. Woeful. Really woeful.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
You Go In The Ring
Wife - You know. The quote about the man in the ring.
Me - Which one is that?
Wife - Where you go in the ring. You might get bashed about a bit but at least you had a go.
Me - You mean, Teddy Roosevelt's Man in the Arena quote?
Wife - Yeah, that's the one.
Me - Well that's a pretty concise summary.
Me - Which one is that?
Wife - Where you go in the ring. You might get bashed about a bit but at least you had a go.
Me - You mean, Teddy Roosevelt's Man in the Arena quote?
Wife - Yeah, that's the one.
Me - Well that's a pretty concise summary.
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
.
You might get bashed about a bit. But at least you had a go.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Kill it, Cook it, Eat it
...is a fascinating programme on BBC3 showing how animals are taken, slaughtered and butchered. It seems that all is done in a humane way although you could easily imagine that once the cameras are switched off they may not be so thorough in their treatment. But actually I found it very reassuring. Tonight it was time for the silence of the lambs. The presenter hasn't been great at asking enquiring questions and as such has been a little irritating. However, he almost completely redeemed himself when he sat down next to the lamb farmer, having tasted one part of the lamb's remains being offered to the audience and said to the farmer, "It seems as if people can't get enough of your testicles." Oh, how I laughed. The only trouble is I have hurt my back so I couldn't laugh in such a way as to move it, but that only seemed to make me laugh louder and longer.
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